March 2, 2013 by greenhouse04
I have to say, I am very proud that I successfully potty-trained one child (Eddie). For awhile before it was accomplished I was afraid I’d never complete the task! (Actually, I literally thought I wouldn’t be the one to do it – at that time I thought he’d be returning to his birth mom)
I learned a lot in the process of potty-training Eddie. Basically, I learned a lot because I mostly did it wrong. I pressured; I was disapproving of accidents; I decided he was ready and didn’t wait for him to decide the same thing; I was inconsistent. Ugh, I’m so glad it’s over!
And now it begins again, with Emma. But this time I’ve hopefully learned my lesson and things will go much more smoothly. (I can hope, right?)
Here’s a little list of my hard-learned potty-training wisdom (i.e., my planned technique for training Emma):
- I will (and already have been) talk (and demonstrate) in a non-pressuring way about how Mommy wears panties and goes potty on the toilet, and someday Emma can, too!
- I will (already have) buy her some panties she would really like: Dora panties!
- I will ask her in the mornings if she wants to wear her Dora panties today.
- If she decides to wear them, I will gently stress that she needs to keep Dora dry, so if she needs to go potty she can go on the toilet.
- On days she wears her panties I will expect many accidents, lots of laundry, constant vigilance, and some inconvenience. I will meet these challenges with a smile, knowing they won’t last forever!
- I will never scold her for an accident. I will simply change her into dry panties after I enthusiastically run her to the toilet.
- I will praise her a whole lot for pottying on the toilet, and for even trying. I won’t discourage her if she wants to sit on it over and over in a short period of time. I won’t try to force her to sit on it against her will.
- I will praise her by saying things like “good job. You went potty!” I won’t use praise that equates her character with her ability to go potty, like “good girl,” or “big girl.”
- I will try to review this list daily because I have a very short memory!!
- And one more: I will take it one day at a time. I won’t expect her to want to wear panties every day, to always be cooperative, or for this to be accomplished in a week.
- Oh, and one more again (this is the last, I promise): I’ll look on this time as a chance to demonstrate gentleness and patience to my daughter, that she is more important than my agenda for her, and that I love her and delight in her regardless of her accomplishments.
So there you have it. (Poor Emma – I hope she never sees this post when she’s older and easily embarrassed! Ah well, at this stage nothing is sacred.)
Last Tuesday this plan began in full when, to my surprise, Emma decided to wear her Dora panties. She wore them all day – from 8 in the morning to 8 at night. She went through about 7 pairs (lol), but she never had a really bad accident and she went potty on the toilet a whole lot! It was a good start to the training. Since then she has worn panties and diapers according to her whim, but has already learned very good control. I’ll keep you posted as to the future. 🙂